A couple of weeks ago, I made a mistake. I responded to someone out of anger and without thinking. The next day, I responded to the person out of pride. I left a message, apologizing a day or two later, but the individual still isn't speaking to me. I have gone to confession and am trying to remember to pray for her regularly. I am also reading gentle reminders about how I should have responded.
Based on my pastor's recommendation, I try to read
My Daily Bread by Fr. Anthony J. Paone each morning. In the days following my blunder, I read about conquering bad habits. More specifically, I read about conquering anger, impatience, fault finding, and rash judgements. I needed to read Fr. Paone's gentle reminders and I wish that I had read these passages before I offended this individual.
Rash Judgments
CHRIST:
MY CHILD, mind your own business, and do not set yourself up as the judge of those around you. There is a good deal that you do not know about your neighbor. It is not easy to judge others as they deserve. Be wise and leave all judgment to Me.
2. It is far more profitable for you to look to yourself and judge yourself. You can do a great deal about correcting your own faults. As for the faults of others, the best you can do is to give good example, offer a bit of advice where it will help, and say a sincere prayer for the persons involved.
3. Your concern over your neighbor's faults, does not always arise from a virtue in you. Some people annoy you because you are not minding your own business, or because you have not yet learned patience and understanding.
People are not always at fault when they get on your nerves. The real fault is often in you. I suffered many things in silence for your sake. How often do you suffer in silence for Me?
Get to work and correct your own faults. You will then be too busy to be annoyed by the faults of others.
THINK:
How much peace of soul I could enjoy if only I could learn to mind my own business. judging others is such a waste of precious time. I am so often wrong when I think ill of others. If I dislike someone, I feel inclined to judge him more harshly than others. If God were my main interest, I would never think ill of anyone, even those who really offend me. How often I am aroused against someone because, knowingly or unknowingly, he has opposed my pride or selfishness in some way. I should not expect everyone to see things my way. Every man is different and each one has his own tastes and experiences. So often God excuses those whom I condemn.
PRAY:
My Lord, I long for a ray of heavenly wisdom, so that I may not be unreasonable in my judgments and opinions about others. You treat each person as an individual. You do not ask me to be like others in my ways. You only want me to take the talents and circumstances in my life, and to make the most of them. You ask us to imitate You as far as we are able, according to the intelligence and grace which each one has. Let me not judge rashly those who do not do things my way. I want to follow Your holy Will in all things. Though I observe the mistakes and faults of others, I will try to refrain from any harsh judgments. If I cannot say something kind of another, I will keep silent. Amen.
Fr. Anthony J. Paone, My Daily Bread, pp. 79-80